T - minus 10 days

Yesterday, I received my schedule. My law school schedule. Armed with this, I was also able to finally put together my law school booklist - for the modest price of 816.02 dollars. It might still go up, too. Granted, I have a couple of extra books included in that price - like Contracts: Examples and Explanations or 1000 Days to the Bar - but still at $120 a casebook - law school is expensive. I knew that already but I never really considered the books.

I'm sitting on the couch, with a miniscule, beaten and torn-up and subsequently stitched up black kitten. He's the newest and youngest of the three that we adopted. We rescued him from Animal Control. He was malnourished with a huge, swollen belly and he had to have recontructive surgery for his nose - because a piece of it was hanging off. He also has a good-sized scar on his side, from what we cannot figure out. He already has small battle scars on his ears from fights. What fights he could have gotten into at barely 3 weeks old, I cannot imagine. He's playful and curious. He's tiny and adorable - resembling a spider or hairy octopus more than a kitten to be honest.

To return to the subject of my schedule, it's a nice one. I start at 9.30 every day and end usually at 1, except for mondays and wednesdays, when I end at 3. As several friends have commented - it's not the class time but the workload that is going to be the issue.

I got new highlighters and notebooks. I'm going to be getting my books soon and Orientation is in about 10 days. Oh god.

Alexa asked me if I was nervous. My response was basically "Hell Yes". As much as I act like an extrovert, I'm very much an introvert. I get really nervous meeting new people, making administrative calls, or even calling my best friends. I never really know what to say. So I fall back on my laughter and my smile. At home, before I set foot outside, I'm usually a disaster of nerves and worries; my self-esteem resembles a penguin trying to walk gracefully more than a calm and collected feline. But, as soon as I set foot out the door, as soon as I make my appearance, I stop. I try to appear cool and collected, I swallow my worries and I put on my best face. I enjoy that feeling. There's no point in stepping out if I don't. I'm not sure I'm explaining in the best way, but when I step out I become an extrovert. I've accepted what outfit I chose, even if the other shoes would have probably made more sense, and I have no choice but to ignore whatever self-image issues I may have. I become someone completely different than who I was five minutes before in front of the mirror - trying to figure out what outfit to put together.

At law school Orientation, you must make an impression - you must seek out and talk to the professors, you must make friends with the upperclassmen. Oh god.

Am I ready?